


Remember

by Jfms



Category: Merlin (TV)
Genre: Canon Compliant, Canonical Character Death, Character Study, Gen, Light Angst
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-04-21
Updated: 2020-04-21
Packaged: 2021-03-02 03:27:41
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,082
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23768473
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Jfms/pseuds/Jfms
Summary: Gwen's mom says to never lose that, because kindness is what makes Gwen a good person.And Gwen listens to her.Well, she tries to.
Kudos: 5





	Remember

Gwen is a little peasant girl with the heart that aches for each and every person she meets. Everyone loves her for that heart. The court physician mr. Gaius, who is old and grumpy and never meets anyone’s eyes, nearly lights up each time Gwen waves at him when she sees him fly through the streets of Lower town to visit a patient. The baker, Olyvia , skinny young woman with gnarled fingers and weary eyes, always slips her mom a bun with sweet apples in it. “ _For Gwennie_ ” she whispers hoarsely. Even Leon, a boy, for whom family Gwen's mum works for, who is slightly older, but already training to be _a real knight,_ gives her a red feather “for her future helmet” when she rescues a puppy from a pond. 

Gwen's mom says to never lose that, because kindness is what makes Gwen **a good person**. 

And Gwen listens to her. Well, she tries to. Time passes and the next time Gwen throws herself at the knights dragging away, _just on the basis of some whispers, idle gossips_ , another weeping old woman that Gwen knows will never return, everything goes by a new scenario. They don’t ask for her parents, don’t try to soothe her or give her away in the arms of the most compassionate bystander, no, all she gets is a shove, painful and insulting. The force of it leaves Gwen tumbling to the ground.

“Know your place, girl. Leave all this hysterics for your boyfriend” - the knight says, stern, not even looking at Gwen. Next second they walk away with the woman in tow, people parting in front of them.

Suddenly, there are a lot more of these new scenarios. Gwen accompanies her mother on the feast in her work place and all her girlfriends, that she knew since _forever_ , don’t meet her eyes. Gwen shares her plans to go on a king audition in late autumn, since she is finally of age to come. Gwen says she’ll ask about lowering the taxes since this year harvest was so small, but instead of usual encouragement and cheerful back pats, there are sad chuckles.

”The only thing that will go down this winter is their pockets” Tom says bitterly and everyone _laughs_ , like this is funny, like this is some sort of inside joke, that everyone except Gwen understands. Even Elyan, her sweet, witty baby brother Elyan, who never knew how to keep his mouth shut and always seemed to acquire a _nemesis,_ wherever he went, goes silent when his old mates, now squires, tease him, lowers his head and squeeze out a chuckle. And Gwen wants to ask if he is mad, but swallow her words instantly, the memory of herself ushering away young stablehands so that counsel Uden could buy a sword flashing through her brain. Because a noble can’t be seen buying from a Lower town smith. Because the noble brings third of all the money her father earns in this season. Because if they would have enough money to throw albeit small, but a gathering, with enough food for at least 10 people, maybe someone would be able to skip an evening of work and mourn Gwen's mother passing with her family. 

Then Gwen isn’t making plans to become a hero, to apply her talents for the betterment of society, to show these people, that we all can be brothers and sisters, and together, and equal. Gwen turns the other way when she sees the prince bully another servant out of boredom. She only curses him where no one, but another helpless soul like her can hear. She is silent when another of her distant acquaintance gets taken for “questioning”, when the knights shake the Wensley widdow out of her last penny, when in multitude of shapes in red capes Gwen recognize one, with golden curls and dopey smile. 

And something rots inside of her, before it had time to grow. Gwen doesn’t know whether it matters that her kindness makes her a good person, because she feels that her actions makes her a bad one. So when Gwen gets sentenced to death for something she didn’t do, something she knows nothing about, though she never even _talked_ about magic, though she cried and begged and sweared, Gwen is reconciled to her lot. _It’s payment for all the times you stayed silent or looked away,_ she thinks, trying not to cry when Solah, a kitchen maid, sneaks her her favorite apple pastry.

It all ends well. Merlins finds the real culprit and she is released into her long-suffering and alive, _thank god, alive_ father care. 

Merlin is a country bumpkin as people call them in Camelot. He is earnest and brave and _good_. Gwen saw him stand up for that bully of a prince Albion have and just like this the next second she was ready to do everything for him. 

Talking of the prince, Merlin and Morgana swear Arthur has a good heart. Gwen doesn’t quite believe them. 

But then despite his childishness and complete lack of tack Gwen sees something in him. She sees him talk against his father, she sees him sneaking out to help his manservant’s village, that isn’t even in his lands, she sees him help to save _a druid boy,_ in Camelot, where his own father forbidden magic. She knows, hears enough about it from Morgana, that frequently princes have their hands tied almost as tight as servants. And this.This gives Gwen hope. 

Six years later, she sits beside Arthur at the round table and meet Elyan’s eyes across from her. He smirks and using a couple precise words leaves speechless counsel Uden, to whom Gwen proceed to explain, calm and dignified, that his taxes plan won’t work unless every farm worker grows 2.76 extra arms. She knows that thanks to what she does, what they all here do the Wensley widdow would be able to afford to sew her only daughter a new dress for her 18 birthday, finally not from her older brothers’ tunics’ scraps. Olyvia the baker - hire a help to wash all her forms and trays. Tom’s family - not take him, a 72 year-old man, to harvest.

Most important Gwen can stand on her dear mother grave and know that one of her many gifts to this world, her family, where each member stayed kind, _stayed good_ despite all the misfortunes, her family keeps on giving to this world and her family remembers.

**Author's Note:**

> I decided to make a collection of all my fic-esque tumblr posts.  
> https://www.tumblr.com/blog/justformerlinstuff


End file.
